Happy 4th Birthday

Our little man turns 4 on Monday. I approached his 3rd birthday with sadness due to his lack of major progress, rather than the joy parents usually feel. A couple weeks ago as I started to think through this next birthday I had the same feelings of "Where's the progress?" However, after voicing my concerns to God and anyone else who would listen, I have been overwhelmed by opportunities to see the progress X-Man has made. Here are a few things that have changed in the last 12 months.

1. His name and our peace that he will be staying a forever part of our family. It's great to be off the roller coaster ride of emotions that can accompany fostering to adopt. It's great to be able to leave town without having to have a judge sign off on it. It's great to sign him up for new therapies and realize they don't even know he is adopted until we get into health history info.

2. He is walking everywhere with a reverse walker. He did not get his walker until July 2009, but he is a pro at wheeling that thing around now. He pulls himself into it with ease and can turn himself around 180 degrees when he hits a dead end. The first couple months that we had the walker we would find it abandoned outside of our daughter's door which is at the end of the hall. It was like a dead end. Now he can walk down there, knock on her door and then turn around completely.

3. He is trying to communicate more needs than just wanting to eat or drink. This time last year, he was signing but the only signs he used on his own without us first saying the words were "eat," "outside," "swing," "music" and "all done." Now he signs for specific foods and has begun to use more gestures like pointing to the food pantry. He is combining signs as well. At church he signed "More Music Please." He is trying to quickly repeat sounds in many words. He isn't saying many full words still, but if the word contains a sound he knows, he at least says that sound.

4. In the past month, X-Man has become much stronger in his ability to walk while holding on to just one of our hands. He is also lifting and lowering himself with ease. He made a game out of picking toys up off the floor to put on the table back and forth. Great workout for him and demonstration of his ability to go up and down without falling now.

5. Speaking of falling, it is happening so much less often. Last year at this time it was still pretty exhausting to watch him as he was falling a lot still. Our stress levels have decreased a great deal as he has become more coordinated. Of course, the wall to wall carpeting we purchased this year helps too.

6. We were concerned early on about reactive attachment disorder as our little guy had a few too many caregivers and lack of structure in his first 18 months. He has never shown major signs of RAD, thankfully, but this year he has become so much more loving. He climbs into my lap now which never interested him last year. He reaches for us when he needs soothed. I didn't even realize that he wasn't doing this until he started to. He gives very sweet hugs and leans in for kisses, signing "more" when we give him a kiss on the cheek.

7. His size. X-Man has gained over 6 pounds and 4 inches this year. After struggling for the first years of his life with not growing, he is FINALLY on the growth percentile chart. He's still at the bottom of that chart, but we're so thankful that he is on there at least!

8. He is beginning to purposefully play with toys. This is an emerging skill and we have really seen it develop in the past month. He has a music cube that he turns until he finds the orchestra symbol and then presses that with his thumb. He has two toys that are on a string that he drags around with him throughout the house. He loves to play with a car that you have to shake up to make it go. He learned within a day how to make it work and loves to shake it. I know this isn't rocket science and should have developed years ago, but we are pretty happy to see this kind of thought, planning, and hand coordination developing in our little guy.

9. Meal times are much more pleasant. This time last year, we could only get him to sit at the table for about 5 minutes before he started yelling to get down. He now sits through the whole meal and we can go out to eat together as a family if we walk around with him before the food arrives. This time last year I was seriously thinking that dinner peace may not be a part of our lives for years to come. He can feed himself with a spoon now and his appetite has increased greatly.

10. He is no longer on oxygen at night. His central sleep apnea has improved to the point that we could discontinue oxygen. This is a great relief.

Wow, I could actually keep writing more examples of his great strides this year. I don't know about anyone else, but I'm encouraged right now which is my whole point in keeping this blog.